Typical morning, circa July 2008

I walk into his darkened room, and see him highlighted in shades of red from his Lightning McQueen nightlight. Every morning half of me is so excited to wake him and start a new day, and the other half hates to throw a rippling rock onto the stillwater peacefullness of his sleep. Oh right, and there's also the fact that once I shatter that illusion, the next 15 minutes are spent with Brent, the Superhero of Bad Morning Attitudes.

I try to ease him into the day, and sit beside him on the bed, quietly rubbing his back. Nothing happens. "Brent....." I whisper in his ear. "Honey, it's time get up...". Usually this is greeted either again with nothing, or by him turning his face into the pillow and groaning "Noooooooooo".

"But Brent, it's time to go to school. Time to go play with Lucy and do artwork. Doesn't that sound fun?"
"I don't WANT to go to SCHOOL. I don't WANT to go. I don't WANT to go!!"...his eyes are still squeezed shut and his body completely tightens and turns into a straight, stiff board.
"Okay, then. I'll just sit here and pat your butt. Do you know how cute your little butt is?"
"Yles, I know! But I don't WANT to go to SCHOOL"
"Well, lets just change out of your jammies and put your clothes on, and then go potty, and you can go back to sleep in the car, okay?" (Believe it or not, this actually works 99% of the time, too. Even though by the time we get there he's wide awake.)
"Okay mommy. You carry me?"
"Sure, at least to the potty"
"You carry Duncan?"
"Fine....you ready to go?"
"Yles. I want to go to a reshuree"
"A What??"
"I wanna go to a reshuree"
(Blank stare)
(Blank stare back at me)
"Can you say it real slow??"
"Re.....shur......ee....."
Hmmm, no help there.
Suddenly, in one of those freak parenting moments where the lightbulb of absurdity starts shining in the darkness of your mind, I knew.
"You want to go to a restaurant?"
"Yles!!!!"
"Well, you're going to see your grandma tonight, maybe you can ask her"
"She'll say yes, mommy"
I laugh at that...he's right. "Okay then. Ready to go now?"
"Yles!"